August 2010 – My Truant Pen

So you think I’m self-confident

Part of being in your 30s is finally knowing a bit of who you are. You can get rid of that setting for four because you never feed four people: it’s either just your family or it’s a minimum of six people. You can pass on the lovely porcelain figurine you inherited because it turns out you’re not a knick-knack person. You can wear big jewelry and not feel self-conscious because you’re a person who wears big jewelry, and you really don’t have to think that hard about it.

One of the real joys of my late 20s and 30s for me has been being ok, downright comfortable even, with who I am. I can present at a big important meeting, speak in public, plan a party, sing the Halleluia Chorus, fix plumbing and make a peach pie. I know how to comport myself at an opera, and feel at home in fancy French restaurants (especially ones IN France… YUM!). After a quick look around, I handled a Turkish bath (with all states of undress) just fine. In all sorts of walks of life: from church to work to culture to leisure, I don’t ponder whether or not I belong. I just engage in what we’re there to do.

There is one huge, glaring exception to this.

Manicure/pedicure places freak me out.

This spring I went to get a mani/pedi at a local place. Like every single place I’ve ever been to, it was staffed by a variety of Asian women (I believe they’re generally Vietnamese?!) and attended by a variety of white women, all of whom seem to know everyone and be in media res with the latest gossip. There are at least two tvs on, with some incredibly annoying movie playing. The lady at the counter never makes eye color with you when she tells you to pick out your color.

The steps of getting a mani/pedi are like this intricate dance. You do the pedicure first. God help you if you didn’t plan ahead and are wearing socks and/or jeans. The person is usually chatting to their fellow technicians, while the other people getting pedicures are talking about all the people they know. There are all these steps to it, and so many of the customers there are there regularly — weekly even — that you feel like the only idiot who has to be told what to do. And there are all these unspoken things… do they take credit cards or only cash? You have to pay before they’re done, or you’ll smudge your fingers. How much do you tip? And you just KNOW that this gaggle of women will not hesitate to discuss any faux pas you may have made after you depart.

By the time I got out last time, I was nearly a nervous wreck. I felt ill with the strain of it — totally self inflicted of course. Granted, my fingernails looked great, but it just wasn’t worth it. I did my own nails the other night. The outcome wasn’t nearly as good, but the tv on had baseball and it hardly cost me a thing other than time.

So that’s me. Where are you unexpectedly uncomfortable? Where do you feel like an outsider, and despite your competence in many arenas, avoid?

Breaking news

So rumor on the street is that there’s a worldwide shortage of FUDGE dice caused by the emergence of a Dresden Files game using the mechanic.

I’m happy to say that I was cool and using FUDGE dice years, YEARS before the bandwagon fans did. My house is well supplied with FUDGE dice, as well as enough D12s for a whole HORDE of barbarians.

We have an unreasonable amount of dice. Grey could correctly conjugate die/dice by age 2.

Ahem.

In slightly less geeky news, batch 3 of plum jam is popping away on the counter. It still looks darker than last year’s magic batch. I wish I knew what varietal it was. I’m pretty sure these aren’t damson plums, and from what I’ve read I may have to track down some damsons for yet another batch, because they sound awesome.

Grey brought one of his Star Wars books to school today and read it to his class. I wonder if he pronounced the “r”s? It’s funny what even an open-minded parent like myself won’t put up with.

OK. Dice shortages and yet another jam update. That’s a sign that I should leave you all to your sweet dreams!

Peach butter and babies

You know, in my day job I’m all professional. I knowingly use acronyms. The word “synergy” unironically passes my lips. I’m actually a technical professional, which ups the number of acronyms like 50% from everyone but finance, who has a vocabulary entirely made up of acronyms. Real grownup professional. I swear. Ok, yeah. I don’t buy it either.

Right now I’m sitting at my kitchen table. Monday, my double-fruit share from Farmer Dave showed the ugly side of a bumper crop, when my take-home number of peaches hit thirty-two. 32. That’s THIRTY TWO PEACHES (on top of 8 nectarines). Nearly ten pounds of peaches, people. Now, I’ve made my fair share of peach pies this summer. (Mmmmm…. peach pies.) But 32 peaches is like 4 peach pies. Or maybe three. And I didn’t have TIME for four peach pies. Or pie starter. I knew that I needed to can it. To my surprise and chagrin, peach jam was quite a disappointment last year. It was sugary and crystallized after opening. But apple butter was a delight. So tonight, peach butter. Why not?

Of course, it’s easy to airily say “Why not?” before you have peeled and cubed about 20 peaches, but whatever. I bought a big canner pot this year, for the apple butter. I usually jam with pectin, because that’s how my mom does it, but the butters don’t use pectin. Just sugar, lemon and time. I’m caught between hoping it’s good (did I mention how amazing the apple butter is on corn bread?) and hoping it’s not so that I’m not on the hook to make it every year. I mean, a family can only eat so many preserves, and this is my seventh? Eight? batch of something this summer, and I MUST still make damson plum jam and apple butter. I think I need to buy more jars. And make more friends. Be warned, if you enter my house…. better yet, I have never once met a non-fruit-eater, so don’t you go thinking your dietary constraints will save you. Muahahah!

Anyway, in other news, the big boy bed. Guess what? It’s NO PROBLEM. It’s like Thane hasn’t even noticed that there’s been a change in his bedtime routine. You put him on the bed. You give him puppy. You leave the room. You hear from him again at 6:15 in the morning. One can hope that maybe he’ll start to play a bit in the mornings — specifically Saturday mornings. But it was a complete non-event in terms of disruption. Man, I love that kid.

Ok, I better make sure the butter isn’t burning. I wonder if it will be good on pancakes, maybe….

The changing of the seasons

One of the things I don’t like about myself is how far ahead I get. There are advantages, of course. I usually plan in sufficient time. I am seldom taken unawares by the next step. But in children and summer, you give up a lot by pushing to be further along than you need to be. So I pause and take seriously this feeling in the air, to make sure it is not just because I am pushing.

But no. I came back from Istanbul, the heat of summer in the Mediterranean, to discover one flamboyantly yellow birch on my commute home. It has since been joined by several maples in scarlet on quiet roads. Being that it’s mid-August, I suspect drought has advanced the season, and not just my perspective. But still. The days are hot and humid, but shorter. Night arrives earlier, and lacks the sultriness of July. A tell-tale crispness creeps over the window panes in the early morning hours. We are, by no means, into autumn, but we can see it on the horizon.

As for the other season? I am passing out of the baby time of life. I nursed a child for the last time nearly a year ago. One dark night when I laid Thane into his crib… that was the last night. And tomorrow? Tomorrow they are bringing my baby a bed, with no sides. He will lie unrestrained and tiny on rocket-ship sheets with a blanket and a pillow — faithful Puppy still firmly at hand, golden curls pressed against the unfamiliar mattress.

And it’s not just the bed. It’s been a while since I’ve given you a proper Thane update, but oh! What a big boy he is. At the farmshare pickup after Istanbul, I ran into a friend from church. “It was fun to see your family all in tie-dye,” she said, “But who was the curly-headed kid? And did you bring Thane with you?” She wasn’t being sarcastic, or joking. She literally didn’t recognize my Thane. He does so many big boy things. He climbs, jumps and runs. He’s very good at puzzles. He sits and reads books. He organizes his cars by colors and carries them throughout the house, lining them up. He speaks in full sentences now: “I found it!” “Car mine!” “Yummy pancakes” “Cereal and milk, please” “No, thank you”. He even comes up with new sentences. For example, the other day in the car when I started in on the “ABC” song, he said, “No! Daddy ABC!”

He can recite his numbers to ten. He sings about 90% of the ABC song. He knows “Ring Around the Rosy” and “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” and sings them to himself. He tells knock knock jokes (endlessly!) at dinner. He can correctly identify all the basic colors.

He eats cereal in a bowl with milk. He snitches his father’s ice tea. He climbs into his high chair and car seat for himself. He follows instructions (when he chooses to). He will come lay his head on your knee and say “Nuggle”. He has two kinds of kisses: real kisses and “all tongue” kisses, and thinks it’s hilarious when he can give you one of the latter. Whenever he sees a cell phone, he demands to speak to “Gamma! Gamma! Gamma!” He can correctly identify our two cats by name.

He pours sand on himself first thing when he gets to a sandbox. I’ve brought him home and put him on the changing table, and had rivers of sand fall out of his pockets. He can tell you when he wants a new diaper. I’ve started him sitting on his potty chair, to begin that years-long process.

In a word, he’s not a baby anymore. He’s a toddler, a child, a boy, a curly-haired blue-eyed delight… many things, but not a baby. That season has passed.

Istanbul and Camp Gramp: Final Day

August 7

Adam and I are about five hours from the time shown on my little travel alarm clock. So I suppose, against my great desire, I must admit that our sojourn in Istanbul draws to a close.

After another sleepless night, we dragged our weary carcasses out of bed in time for the free breakfast at the hotel. As an aside, I’m mightily glad we don’t usually watch cable news over breakfast. Anyway, we then went back to the Archaoelogical museum. See, it’s not air-conditioned at all, so last time we only saw about half of it in hundred degree heat before calling “uncle”. We are nothing if not thorough, so we returned for the other half. I was hoping that fourteen centuries of being a beacon of success, art, opulence and learning in Constantine’s fair city might get, oh its own wing or something. Sadly, Constantinople seemed underrepresented in the archaeological museum. We did see about a gagillion first century marble busts, and an ample sufficiency of Terra cotta jars from Troya… As well as a few snide remarks about which European Museum has the good stuff. Still, the marble heads were lovely!

After that we took the tram across the Golden Horn. Istanbul has a fine transit system, far more modern and clean than Boston’s. From there we waited by the water for a ferry. I watched a kind Turkish woman give money to a poor looking woman with a little baby. It struck me how few here seem destitute. I think I’ve seen one beggar the entire time (the woman with the baby wasn’t asking for help, but clearly needed it). Then the same kind woman insisted on paying our ferry fare since we were guests in her country. The hospitality and kindness of the Turks has been astonishing. Anyway, we took a brief trip across the Bosphorous to a tiny island on the Asian side called either Maiden’s Tower or Leander’s Tower. It offered a lovely view of the skyline of historic Istanbul. We climbed to the top and then back down for lunch. While there I picked up a pebble for Grey. He’s very interested in Asia, so I thought he might enjoy a tiny piece of it.

The same kind lady took this picture of us at Maiden's Tower

On our return to Europe, we went to find the remaining columns of the Hippodrome. The Million we’d passed daily, but we never gone the extra block to see the Obelisk, which is either a reconstruction or shockingly well preserved, the serpentine column, or the brazen column. Then we got dessert. Have I mentioned how much I will miss Turkish food?

The Serpentine Pillar. It used to have three snakes' heads on the top.

Finally, we went back to the Bosphorous near our hotel and sat by the water with sea breezes in our face and joked with each other while the sun set behind us. Lovely.

Tomorrow’s journey comes too soon. but I must confess, I miss my boys sorely. I think that this trip has been everything I hoped for, in terms of food for the mind and soul, and nurture for a marriage we plan to make go the distance.

I will see you all soon!

Brenda

Meanwhile, back in the States
It is a bit early for the report of the final full day for Camp Gramp, but I am planning to be busy this evening. There is a rumor out there that the Flynns are returning to the castle and right now it looks like — well I don’t want them to see it this way. So the evening is devoted to restoration. The cars will be returned to their customary place. The Legos returned to their box, the books re-shelved. A good time as been had by all — The grandparents are still alive!

Today we went to the Science Museum to see if we could find the camera. As Don points out, it may also be here. After that we headed north by our family’s navigation and found Bunker Hill where Grey and I climbed to the very top. There was rolling down the hill. And there was running down like mad. There was no ice cream eating — we are soooooo mean. Then by the same aforementioned navigation, we headed north. Cape Ann is lovely! We followed the perimeter road around the very end. We went to the state park where we saw a presentation on bats and visited the quarries. We also saw lobster pots — many of them.

Home was much closer than I thought. We are here now and Baz is making dinner. Hot dogs and Quesedillas. Sounds good to me.

Thanks for lending us your children.

Love Gramama and PAPAPA

Finis

Istanbul & Camp Gramp: Days 5 & 6

August 5 – back in the States (I was too lazy to write home)
Today was Museum of Science day. It had been steadly growing hotter since we got here and today — oh my. This morning Baz noted that he couldn’t get his shirt off. It was so warm and humid. A place with air conditioning, we thought. That is an awesome museum. Thane loved the discovery center — water and balls, how can it get any better. So did Kay who loves to dress up and made a wonderful coffee filter butterfly there. Baz and I want the electricity show in our living room. The worlds largest Vandegraph generator — and we are talking 40 ft. high or so. It was awesome. Grey liked the whales exhibit and the dinosaurs. They had this astonishing replica of a whale heart there — easily 6 feet high lying on its side. The kids could crawl in it. While we were there, it rained and cool off the land. Still muggy, but not so hot,which is good.

We returned all the children to the car, tired by happy. Then we started to get out of the garage. 35 minutes to get out of the garage. 35 minutes! After that, piece of cake. I had been dreading rush hour, but it was speed limit the whole way home. The other direction, however, into town was stop and go almost to home. I wonder what was up.

When we got home, we ate and I gave Thane a bath. I have never seen a child who loved baths as much as he does. The older kids and the adults then watched “Up”. The evening ended with glow sticks. Very nice day.

Your children are all fine. Dad and I are still alive. I hope you are all having a great time.!

Love, Grandmama

August 6

We began our anniversary day (editor’s note: August 5) with a trip to the Church of Cora, which, rumor had it, still had intact mosaics. And so it did. They were quite splendid, and we spent a happy hour twisting our necks and guessing at Bible stories. (The genealogy of Christ had us flummoxed for a while, I confess.)

The Church of Chora - mosaics & frescoes

From there we took a death defying taxi trip across the Golden Horn to the Fortress of Europe. It was every 12 year olds dream of a fortress! There were battlements and high walls and precarious staircases and murder holes and high towers. It was extremely cool. After a much more sedate return taxi trip, we went again to the
Turkish baths, because they are extremely awesome.

The Fortress of Europe was SO COOL. Bring your walking shoes.

Today we slept in again. Ambition has been replaced by a certain degree of lethargy. We went to this really cool museum of Islamic scientific contributions from 900 to 1600. (Note: The Islamic Scientific and Technology Museum in lovely Gulhane Park. By far the best interpreted museum in Istanbul and completely worth a visit.) It was awesome. We spent about four hours there, reading about everything from seige machines to astrolabes to optics. Our only regret was lacking the classical scientific background to understand it all, especially the math and navigation sections.

I want a book called "Astrolabe for Idiots"

The last remaining goal for our last remaining day is to touch Asian soil. We see it across the water, but it is a residential, not tourist area. So we will probably go tomorrow only to have gone.

It has been a spectacular and outstanding trip… One of the finest. We have had good luck, good food, good weather and good company. We only hope you all are doing as well!

Brenda

Meanwhile, back in the States

Today was lovely. We stayed home most of the day. In the morning we went to the used book store and the park to play. While Thane napped, we made Shrinky Dinks. Then we played in the back yard for a while. Adam and Brenda, about the orange ball. Do you know how long that takes to pump up! But having gotten it pumped up, it is a real hit. They are rolling all over the yard. Dinner and a walk to the ice cream place to get dessert.

This may not sound perfect to you. What was perfect was the weather. High 70s, low humidity, nice breeze. It was awesome

The bad news is, we can’t find the camera (editor’s note: TRAGEDY!). We think we had it at the Museum of Science, but we can’t find it anywhere. This is very sad. It has the trip to see my mom and the Camp Gramp pictures on it. We will continue to look.

Gramama

Istanbul Pictures

Oy! We took a lot of pictures, amazingly, in Istanbul. Here they are. I would apologize for having 93 pictures of the Fortress of Europe & cool devices in the Museum of Science and Technology in Islamic History, but hey. You all asked for pictures of MY vacation, and that’s what was important to me!

With no further ado: Here you go

Istanbul & Camp Gramp: Day 4

August 4

Today was a day for indolence. We slept in until nearly noon (which I’m paying for now with an inability to go to sleep). Then we managed to haul ourselves all the way to a cool and shady cafe, where we spent the next four hours reading. Which, as memory serves, is more or less how we spent our honeymoon, minus thank you notes.

After our protracted lounging, we went to the Grand Bazaar. One is never quite sure how one did. I’m pretty sure I paid too much for the strings of stones I bought to have my mother-in-law string together for me. I think we paid the right price for the beautiful and finely made leather purse I bought, which when prorated over the next six years was quite reasonable.

We walked home, had dinner in this great cafeteria type thing which is teaching my husband to love aubergine, read in the shadows of the Blue Mosque and Hagia Sophia, and then played a board game before bed. Which was like two hours ago.

Now I’m valiantly resisting the lure of my book, which is excellent, and in which I have about three hundred or so pages left to go.

Tomorrow we are planning on visiting the Church in Cora, followed by the Fortress of Europe. The last must do that remains undone is to set foot on Asian soil. There are no compelling excuses for this in easy reach, so less compeling excuses will have to suffice.

Istanbul is lovely, and a delight in all ways. We miss our boys, but are revelling in every minute of the friendly and exotic city. I hope you’re all having fun!

Brenda

Meanwhile, back in the states…

It was our stated goal to return the children in the pristine condition we found them. Sigh. Today Thane met the sidewalk during the picture taking and has a very mild abrasion on his forehead, lip and knee. Less than 1 minute of crying and no blood, but I suspect it may be a bit bruised tomorrow. We are sorry.

Otherwise, the picture taking was great. I was for taking the pictures at the house where the crew could be contained, but Coe (pronounced as in Co-operate) had looked up the stuff for the Fells and was for out doors. It was more fun and the pictures are really great! She took about 100 pictures — the kids together, the kids individually, us together. Then she stayed for lunch — what a brave woman. She will give us CDs and post the pictures on line at a site where we can get copies. This was the best photo session we have had. She will get the things to you in the next two weeks.

This afternoon I made good on a promise to the older kids. We went back to Revere Beach while Papapa stayed with Thane. He and Thane had a nap and then a competition free afternoon. A great time was had by all. The kids played about two hours building sand castles and playing in the waves. They were very cooperative and none of them threw themselves in the water like someone did the last time we were there. On the way to I noticed construction on Northbound 93 so decided to take a different route home. I am soooo smart. Don says the delay out of Boston was 2 1/2 hours. I took 16 to 28. 28 was difficult for a while, but then flowed fairly well. I got on the freeway just after the blockage and the traffic was wonderful! 45 minutes home. Not bad!

It was too hot to cook so we took them to the 99. They were wonderful — not upset by the upset glass of water or any of the rest of the nonsense. Our waitress even laughed at the boys jokes. Thane ate 2 hot dogs, some chips, a Sundae. Baz had a steak which looked great. I have never seen steak on a children’s menu for $5.99 before. I was jealous. Kay had a hot dog and Grey fish things. That takes care of Wednesday.

Tomorrow is supposed to be even hotter == which I am having trouble imagining. I think we will go to the children’s museum.

Peace be with all of us!

Gramama

Istanbul & Camp Gramp: Day 3

We asked where we could get a cup of coffee... and ended up here.

August 3

Following fine Byzantine tradition, our feet are launching a palace coup against the work being asked of them. Istanbul is a city, like Rome, built on seven hills. I think we walked all of them today. Notably, we saw the Blue Mosque (it was blue), half of the Museum of Archaeology (it was not air conditioned and today got up to 38c), and walked to the Spice Bazaar where we bought very expensive tea and peanuts. Then we walked back by way of the city walls.

We had to scrap plans to visit Ephesus as too expensive, so tomorrow’s itinerary is as yet undetermined. My feet are voting for sleeping in and lounging, but I never listen to the proletariat. How can it be Wednesday tomorrow? We just got here!

It was great to talk to the boys today. We see so many Turkish families wandering around, it makes us miss them even more fiercely. Adam has had to restrain me from buying balloon pants, an embroidered vest and a fez for Grey…. I think he’d look dashing!

Marble sarcophagi at the Archaological Museum

Keep the updates coming mom. I’ve already heard from my blog reading faithful that Camp Gramp updates are obligatory.

Love to you all,

Brenda

Meanwhile, back in the states…

Today we stayed home until after afternoon naps. Actually, only the Boston boys napped, and the older ones under strong objections, but we all had a rest. The early part of the evening was spent trying to find Chuck E Cheese. My map reading capabilities again failed me. Chuck E Cheese lives NE of the 95-3 intersection, not SW. There is a difference. I finally stopped and asked.

I can’t decided if I think Chuck E Cheese is brilliant or evil. The incredible excitement displayed in winning those miserable tickets . 60 tickets for a little candy bar. Yet they love it. Even Thane enjoyed himself. He likes to put the coins in the slots but isn’t interested in the rides themselves. And boy is he fast! He bolts and you better be wearing your running shoes. Kay had two horse rides and got a CSI identification ID. Grey got 40 tickets and loved them. He ran all over the store looking for members of the family with a long string of tickets flying out behind him. Baz is the air hockey champion. He beat everyone but me — we had a headed battle in which I pulled out a narrow victory. They seemed to really enjoy themselves. The food, on the other hand …. they should be ashamed of themselves for serving such food!

After Chuck E Cheese, bedtime snack was at the Dairy cone place in Stoneham. Thane was like a little bird — mouth raised and open – I ceam.

Tomorrow, pictures and then a return trip to the ocean sans the littlest lemming. Brenda and Adam, you are right. I have never seen a child so gleeful about water and the way he throws himself in the surf is terrifying! The next day is supposed to be hot. It has been growing steadily warmer — so we are not looking forward to hot. We are thinking Science Museum. That sounds air conditioned.

We are all well. I am off to bed — just one more check of the troops.

Love, Gramama

Istanbul & Camp Gramp: Day 2

August 2 —

This morning was a tough start. Jet lag persists. But we roused ourselves and headed out to Topkepi Palace, ostensibly before the worst of the tourists hit. After a snag involving insufficient lira and government buildings that don’t take credit cards or dollars, we got in. We saw the harem first. It was lovely, with amazing detail work. There are, however, only so many Iznik tiles you can admire before they blur together. Then, by luck, we caught an open air concert of the military band. It was quite wonderful, although their trumpet section wasn’t up to my standards. After that the circumstances went downhill.

The place was packed with tourists of all stripes. The wait for the treasury was abominable, and the humidity was high. There were some neat things to be seen, but the heat, crowd, lines and lacking interpretations made it difficult for even the most intrepid museum-goers to flourish. We fled for lunch and a siesta.

After lunch we pursued a tip on where we might find a nice, handmade, leather purse…. Not a brand name or knockoff. We were unsuccessful in that quest, but met a nice salesman who admitted that he wasn’t really interested In selling us a purse, and didn’t have any relatives in the bazaar, but wished us luck. We walked home past the Golden Horn, the rail station that was the end of the Orient Express, and an expanse of the Bosporous. We sat in fading golden sun, our backs to ancient walls inscribed with Greek, watching crazy old men swim, fathers fishing with their sons, and mammoth ships negotiating turbulent waters.

A fine dinner, and then dessert on a rooftop restaurant, with a view of night lit Hagia Sophia on one side and the roiling waters of the
Bosporous on the other. My husband and I kept arguing about who had the better view.

Tomorrow is the Blue Mosque… We hope to catch that before the cruise ships overwhelm it. Then the Grand Bazaar in out ongoing purse quest, followed by a landmark cup of coffee in the Spice Bazaar.

At least that’s the plan!

We miss our boys. There are lots of kids here, so we are always reminded. Give them big hugs and kisses for us.

Brenda

Meanwhile, back in the States…
After spending the day looking at all the women in 1830 had to do, I guess shouldn’t complain. We went to Sturbridge Village. Minor complications, but for the most part, it was great fun. The Shirts (tie-dyed) were a hit! People knew we were together, anyway. We rode in the horse drawn carriage and took a ride on the boat. We saw the blacksmith. Pizza may not be 1830, but it was good. Dad got to see the sawmill working — something I saw last time. The children made candle holders. A good time was had by all.

I will try to get a picture of the crew at Sturbridge Village in tie dye off to you shortly. Dad’s is especially colorful!

Gramama and Papapa
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sounds like you are having a great time. So are we.

Sturbridge Village is really awesome. We can go again in the next 10 days free and I am thinking about it. Without Thane, it would be different. Of course, without children at all would be really interesting, but I don’t think we will manage that.

I have never seen a child that liked a bath better than Thane. My goodness. Better get tickets for the 2030 Olympics. I think he will be a swimmer.

The boys are fine. They are tired tonight, but they are both off to bed. Thane is asleep. Grey will be soon. We read lots of books tonight — it was great fun.

How do we get pictures on this computer? (Editor’s note with foreshadowing: I wish I’d managed to send her this information!!!)

Gramama