Happy birthday sweetie

I hadn’t really thought of the fact that my son was due on his cousin’s birthday — at least in part because I (apparently rightly) didn’t think it would relevant. Happy fourth birthday, sweetie.

They grow up too quickly
Happy Cousins

And me? I’m still here. There’s a friend at church who’s about a week behind me in terms of due dates. We pulled into the parking lot the same time this morning, and commiserated on how obnoxious it is to be asked, “You still here?” At the same time, it’s a pretty irresistible question to ask a really, really pregnant woman. On her due date. Which did I mention, it is?

I’m starting to really suffer. I’m sure at least part of it is psychological, but another not-minor part is real. I’m not sleeping at all. I kicked my husband up to the guest room so at least ONE of us could get a good night’s sleep. I’m waking up 10, 15 times a night and I don’t think I’m hitting REM in between. I don’t know why, I think it’s just hormones and heaviness. I ache all over, at least in part I’m sure because I’m not sleeping well enough to heal/relax. I have contractions all the time. Every night for about the last two weeks I’ve gone to bed wondering if they were going to get worse or tail off. And the baby is SO LOW. I can’t even sit down with my legs together — there’s baby between them when I’m sitting. My back aches something fierce. And I just keep getting tireder.

And I could have 15 more days of this! I don’t think I will, but I could.

There were lots of people who told me that just because Grey was late (and his cousins and all three of my mother’s children) didn’t mean that this baby would be late. Maybe he’d be different. Maybe he’d be the outlier. Well, there’s still time for him to be earlier than the average for my family, but he’s out of time to be early, and very very quickly running out of time to be on time. (Given a 12 hour labor, he’d be born a day late.) Although I am having contractions today, I’m ALWAYS having contractions these days.

The consolation that my current tiredness will look like child’s play after the baby is born, and my current aches are not a patch on how crappy you feel for the first week or two postpartum are not actually reassuring me. Go figure.

Ok. I’ll stop whining. At least momentarily.

I have tomorrow set up to be a good chance. I’ll have my membranes stripped at about noon. I have an unreasonably complex dinner planned — Indian food no less. Surely that will do it? Please?

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Brenda currently lives in Stoneham MA, but grew up in Mineral WA. She is surrounded by men, with two sons, one husband and two boy cats. She plays trumpet at church, cans farmshare produce and works in software.

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