Tag: nintendo ds

A green Mario DS

Last Christmas, everyone Grey knew got a Nintendo DS from Santa. At daycare Pablo (junior to Grey by nearly a year!), Jordan, Ivan and Isaiah ALL got DSes. At church, Kasper, Thomas and Susan carry them around — that I know of.

Grey, at three years old, did NOT get a video game system for Christmas.

I figured at first that this was the latest passing fad and he’d forget about it and move on to Moon Sand followed by GI Joe action figures. Three year olds are not known for their persistence and patience. I murmured something about maybe if he still wanted it and was good, perhaps one would be forthcoming for his birthday. Christmas to an October birthday is 10 months. That’s like a third to a quarter of his ENTIRE LIFE. In ten months, he went from a newborn to a small walking person. No way was he going to remember come his birthday.

Boy, was I ever wrong. Every. Single. Day. since Christmas, Grey has begged for a DS.

Scene:
Soft light, snuggles on the bed. Mommy is telling Grey a fantastical story about Grey and the Magic, Magic, Magic, Magic Door, which involves a genii in a bottle. The genii appears in a puff of fragrant smoke and offers Grey a wish. What does Grey wish for? (Thoughtful look on an amazingly perfect, sweet face) “A green Super Mario DS”.

Scene:
A rainy morning drive in, with windshield wipers rhythmically passing across a drizzly sky. NPR, talking about the latest financial indicators, is nearly drowned out by the thump of raindrops on the roof and the swish of water from semi tires. Grey sighs wistfully in the backseat. “Mommy? Do you know what I wish? I wish, I wish (oh, if you could hear the wistfulness in that small voice!) I wish I had a DS.”

Scene:
Grey was led into malfeasance by an older child. Specifically, running away and hiding when it’s time to leave daycare. The wrath of MOM is called down upon his head, and great sadness and woe ensue. After the tears are dried, a post-mortem occurs. Mom carefully leads her golden-haired child through the thought process about whether someone who asks you to do something wrong is being a good friend. We’re almost there. “So Grey, would you want to be friends with someone who did something that made you feel badly?” (Grey ponders, seriously, having followed his cues this far.) “If they had a DS, yes.”

If Grey could have anything ANYTHING in the whole world, it would be a DS. I’ve started using the DS as a touchstone for money. “Mommy, can we fly to Grandma Johnstone’s RIGHT NOW?” “No, that takes a lot of money.” “How much money?” “About three DSes”.

Grey has learned truly astonishing social skills in pursuit of the DS. I have seen Grey walk up to a completely unknown child and in less than one minute con them into loaning him their DS so he can play.

All this is to say: Grey is getting a Nintendo DS for his 4th birthday. His Grandma Flynn begged the privilege of being the one to grant him his heart’s desire. His father and I are providing the games (Kirby and Super Mario Bros)

I have extremely mixed feelings about it. I don’t fundamentally object to a child playing video games. We let him play Wii. Last night I let him play video games after preschool because I was tired, and he’d gotten very little screen time over the weekend. But I am very concerned that video games and tv not crowd out both real experiences and reading. I KNOW how addictive video games are. Will he play games instead of building block towers? Instead of learning to read? I also know that the answer to this is good parenting and rules.

Guess what, folks? Good parenting takes ENERGY. Sometimes it’s much easier to avoid a point you know will be contentious. The phrase, “No, you cannot play the DS now” will probably come out of my lips a thousand times in the next two years. I’m tired just THINKING about it. I think the DS will be reserved for car rides and times where he has to wait (drs. office, etc). Maybe exceptions can be made when he is sick (or I am). I suspect this will not delight him.

But in the final analysis, I cannot deny my son something he wants so desperately that is in my power to permit. A three year old can’t get a job and earn enough money to buy his own. In the ways available to him, my son HAS worked extremely hard and diligently in obtaining his goals.

I can’t wait to see the look on his face when he opens that gift from his Grandma. I don’t think I’ve ever held such a dream so hard and had it come true.

The boys at church around a DS
The boys at church around a DS

Of all the things I’ve lost I miss my concentration the most

I’ve started this post about 12 times — not because I have something incredibly delicate or important to say, but because each post has gotten to about the second paragraph and petered out into incoherence. I think I’m starting to show mental symptoms due to the social isolation, interrupted sleep, insufficient mental stimulation (I am coming to believe I have a high need for mental stimulation), and overdose of quality time with my kids.

My mom said that these last few weeks of maternity leave would propel me back into the workforce with a right good will. I think she’s right. I am a perfectly adequate full time mother. But I don’t think it’s where I’m best suited.

Here are some of the disjointed truths that have emerged:

1) Thane has the auburn hair of his great-grandfather Virgil. I saw it in the sunlight this morning and was awed by the realization. There is a hand-tinted wedding picture of my grandparents, shortly after the end of WWII. Thane’s hair is just that color.

2) Grey’s vocabulary has exploded while being at home with me. I’m pretty sure that the extensive time we’ve spent together has just pushed that forward, not made it happen at all. He’s started listening to the radio when I have it on and asking me questions. “What’s “stand up for” mean? What’s a “podcast”? Why are they saying “dangerous”?” You try to explain Hilary Clinton’s Senate testimony, the intricacies of new media, and a discussion of Guantanamo to a three year old.

3) I had been thinking that Grey wasn’t really doing the three year old “why” thing to the level I expected. To some extent, that’s actually true. But then I realized that he often asks “what” when he means “why”. He’s using many more words than three months ago, but not all of them correctly.

4) I would rather be on maternity leave in, say, July. The house is clausterphobic (and cold) in 10 degree weather.

5) I am starting to be concerned about how much sleep I’m needing. I go to sleep with my husband, and wake up 2 to 3 hours after he does. I’m still tired and have trouble concentrating throughout the day. Not all of that can be blamed upon my moonlight wakings. Am I secretly depressed? Do I have mono? Am I paying back a serious sleep debt? Am I opportunistic? Might it be related to the calorie restriction of my diet?

6) Speaking of diet, I lost about 5 pounds last week. I’m debating whether that’s a fluke (water weight, etc.), a problem, or a really effective diet. Part of me is excited about prepregnancy weight in a month. Part of me thinks this is a bad idea.

7) I’m not a very good disciplinarian when I have to do it full time, all the time.

8) Thank heaven for books. As they have been through my life, they’ve been my escape and sanity. I hate it when I remember my dreams and they’re boring.

9) My husband and I have an actual date on Friday, with a babysitter and all. We’re going DANCING. In 0 degree weather. Isn’t insanity grand?

10) Grey begs for a Ninetendo DS several times a day. Both Jordan and Pablito at daycare have one (brothers) and they don’t share. I have no idea what to do. Make it a potty training reward? Buy one for our planned July 4th trip to DC? Resist peer pressure and prove that begging has no effect? We are entering the next stage of parenting with him, and I, for one, am not ready.

11) I have fewer friends than I thought I did. Or rather, I have many fewer people who I can see in real life than I thought — especially on short notice. I know I am socially isolated. It’s not good for me. Compounding that is that I’m not online as often as usual (one of my typical sources of socialization) and that I really, truly have trouble getting out. I’m still nursing Thane like every 2 hours during the day, and every 4 at night. I miss getting to hang out with real live people and chat. On the flip side, I feel depressed by the realization I have little to talk about but parenting and my latest adventure into novels.

12) I’m making good progress on the whole “back” issue. I have an appointment set up with the Spine Center associated with the big health services conglomerate in the area to Figure Out What’s Wrong. I’m guessing that I’ll get some imaging and physical therapy — that sounds just right for me. I also have my first general physical in years scheduled. I have done my pap smear with my midwife for the last several years. I don’t even remember when my last true physical was.

13) I tried acupuncture this week, in my big push to Get Out of the House. It was interesting. Most profoundly, the room was nice and warm and dark and quiet. Mmmmmm…. warmanddarkandquiet. The acupuncturist said I was the healthiest person she’d seen all day. I do better when I don’t have work stress — at least physically.

14) It has been fascinating to see separate parts of my life merge on Facebook. My high school English teacher, my Sunday School kids, friends from my high school youth symphony (mostly the strings — where are the winds?!), a coworker, my long-term friends, my mom… I usually think that I have one self and that self is presented to the whole world. While not untrue, there is a bit of vertigo that comes from having your social circles collide.

15) I miss writing, but feel like I have both little to say and insufficient time in which to say it. Perhaps it is not so much time which is missing, but concentration. Even in bullets, I’m having trouble.

16) I have only a fortnight to go. I have no idea how everything that needs doing will get done when I go back to work. I take it on faith that it will.