Mother’s Log: Star date Friday

Youngest Progeny
Youngest Progeny

Home… the final frontier. These are the ongoing adventures of the Maternal Parental Unit. Her continuing mission: to get her children to productive adulthood without too many crippling emotional scars.

Mother’s log:
Thursday May 10 4:05 pm: Just received word from Paternal Parental Unit that Smallest Progeny has been stricken by a fever. Vast experience reveals that he will not be permitted back to the Progeny Containment Center until normal temperatures have been attained for at least 24 time units. As an experienced Maternal Unit, I have packed all my critical notebooks in my bag to prepare for tomorrow’s inevitable challenges.

Thursday May 10, 7:55 pm: Checked Youngest Progeny’s forehead temperature with Thermal Lip Technology and verified presence of elevated thermal levels. Appearance of Youngest Progeny is very cute and sweet. Enjoying moment of quiet, cute sweetness, knowing it is of a temporary nature.

Friday May 11, 6:05 am: “Sick” progeny awakens and heads downstairs for marathon Scooby Doo until Elder Progeny proceeds to Progeny Education and Normalization Center (Kindergarten).

Friday, May 11, 7:30 am: Maternal Parental Unit recipient of high quality snuggles from unusually quiescent Youngest Progeny.

Friday May 11, 8:30 am: Maternal Parental Unit restores contraband legos (removed for throwing) in order to distract Youngest Progeny for several hours of positive and educational spacial reasoning. Maternal & Paternal Parental Units log in to computers and begin keyboard movements associated with work email.

Friday May 11, 8:35 am: Youngest Progeny needs to use the bathroom.

Friday May 11, 8:36 am: Youngest Progeny does not need to use the bathroom

Friday May 11, 8:37 am: Youngest Progeny needs to use the bathroom.

Friday May 11, 8:39 am: Youngest Progeny can’t possibly use the bathroom.

Friday May 11, 8:42 am: Youngest Progeny uses the bathroom.

Friday May 11, 8:46 am: Youngest Progeny uses the bathroom again.

Friday May 11, 8:50 am: Youngest Progeny actually starts building with restored blocks.

Friday May 11, 9:45 am: Massive civilization has been discovered on second floor, consisting of train tracks, legos & building blocks. Am summoned to inspect giant Platypus that appears to be the leader of the civilization. Giant Platypus is an indifferent conversationalist, a gap of noise made up for by Youngest Progeny.

Friday May 11, 10:20 am: Youngest Progeny insists he can help debug my javascript. Although not primarily responsible for finding case mismatch between variables, he is satisfied with his contributions to the cause. Maternal Parental Unit sets him up with iPad.

Friday May 11, 10:20 – 10:40 am: Youngest Progeny plays every single iPad game, up through the part where the game actually loads. Asks questions every 15 seconds and has learned how to turn up the volume. Maternal Parental Unit laments that 3 year old is not more skilled at video games.

Friday May 11, 11:20 am: In sick day record, Video Entertainment Device is not enabled until now. Youngest Progeny chooses automotive selection, which his elder sibling refuses to watch since it is a favorite movie of Eldest Sibling’s Closest Co-Conspirator. Silence reigns, or at least a Disney soundtrack.

Friday May 11, 12:22 pm: After consuming energy-producing units, the Youngest Progeny is placed in his Dormation Receptacle. The Parental Units anticipate blissful hours of quiet ahead.

Friday May 11, 12:57 pm: Youngest Progeny is actually asleep. Experienced Maternal Parental Unit was anticipating five minute intervals of resubmitting sleep protocol to Progeny in order for successful execution. He must really be sick.

Friday May 11, 3:33 pm: Begin wondering if Youngest Progeny is still alive. Experience teaches that yes, he is still alive and it is a high order of foolishness to go check. Enjoying non-Kiss108, non-KidzBop, non-Disney music while writing 243 SQL insert statements.

Friday May 11, 4:09 pm: Perhaps a transporter accident has put Youngest Progeny beyond time. Contemplating offering him award and promotion for Longest. Nap. Ever.

Friday May 11, 5:37 pm: This adventure concluded, the people of Homeistan come together in celebration of another day accomplished, and celebrate by setting up an entreprenurial lemon-sugar-water related endeavor on the front porch, to the merriment of all. The universe is safe for another day!

Entrepreneurial natives
Entrepreneurial natives

The best laid plans of mice and men

… gang oft agley.

He says "Scooby Doo" instead of cheese
He says "Scooby Doo" instead of cheese

For a week that will end in Burns night, a quote from the Bard of Scotland seems appropriate.

Let me start by saying how grateful I am that my sons now sleep through the night. I’ve realized in the last few weeks that I’ve stopped hearing them while I’m sleeping, instead of the hyper-alertness of the mother of an infant. Mmmmm sleep. (Pity my husband, who still does hear them.)

Anyway, last night my husband vaulted out of bed. In my groggy state, I couldn’t believe that morning was already here… it seemed like I’d just fallen asleep! I heard him getting Thane ready for school and wrapped my blanket more tightly around my ears, wishing he’d closed the door (like he normally does, considerate guy). (By the way, in case you ever think more highly of me than I deserve, let me assure you I’m the biggest, laziest morning-slug you’ve ever met.) Then my husband called for me.

Ugh. Really? I looked at my watch. 12:20.


As I blinked the sleep from my eyes, I found a child covered in vomit and a husband struggling with child, bedding, etc. UGH. I’d like to take a moment to think of Grey, who may not have been potty trained by three but who got himself to the toilet/trash can to throw up nearly 100% of the time. Thane, sadly, is not so trained. Thane threw up another three times last night, every hour, just as we both fell back into deep sleep. So instead of my long list of stuff to do, I’m downstairs with a little boy who is quietly watching a personal all-day Scooby marathon. (I wonder if we have enough Scooby DVDs to watch all day long. I bet we do.)

I’m just hoping he’s well enough to go back to school tomorrow. On the one hand, I am annoyed that my precious time off is spent needing to provide childcare. On the other hand, so much more convenient when I don’t have to attempt to work or anything. On the third hand, my husband is also working from home today, and the kid has been quiet and well behaved so far. And of course finally, I love that little ScoobyDude of mine.

Reasons blogs are useful

The doctor asked me, “How long have you had this?” I answered with confidence, “At least since October 14.” “Hmm… that’s quite a while.”

Sure is, doctor.

Last week I was sure I had a sinus infection (when your molars hurt, that’s the hint). I did get a prescription for antibiotics, but an infection I might have had just laughed them off. HAHAHAH!

This week I had a doozy of a week. Monday was a work from home day due to having no power, followed by Halloween. Tuesday, I was at work at 7:15 am and returned home from work at 10:30 pm or so. Wednesday was another all day, intense meeting with no time for even checking my private email. Thursday at work was an attempt to catch up from all that, but when I got home, I couldn’t handle even gaming. I went to bed at 8, right after dinner. I woke up at 7 this morning not much improved.

It seemed like, maybe, it was time to go to the doctor’s. I made an appointment for 2:30.

At 12:45 I got a phone call from my son’s school nurse. He’d bumped his head during recess and needed to be picked up. I made the pffft sound in my head, believing that they were overreacting, and moved even more meetings in order to go pick him up, knowing I’d have to drag him to my appointment.

Yeah, maybe that's legit
Yeah, maybe that's legit

Sorry kid, I’m not taking you to the doctor because I’m totally more sick than you are injured. He was jealous of my x-rays though. He says he wants x-rays. They are pretty cool, but not as exciting as you might think. I haven’t heard the results yet, but my dr. said that she was pretty sure it was pneumonia and that she would treat it accordingly.

So now I have a note from the doctor saying “Brenda is really sick”, a rescue inhaler (yes, it is that bad), some high power antibiotics, and a weekend to recover.

Here’s hoping that works!